2/15/12

Erotic Nights of the Living Dead (1980)

There are three reasons to watch this movie.  First of all, this is the first movie to be reviewed that scores a 5+ on the Beasts in Human Skin Booby Rating/Index which means it shows a bit of the old in-out, in-out.  The second reason involves a frumpy stripper and a champagne bottle up her vajayjay, and the third reason is because Laura Gemser bites off a guy's willy.

If you haven't guessed already, this is a Joe D'Amato film which means half the film is going to be horror and the other half is going to be a kind of soft, hardcore-ish porn and that's what Erotic Nights of the Living Dead a.k.a. Sexy Nights of the Living Dead is.  Mr. D'Amato was very good at making a buck by taking a theme that was popular in American theaters and adding a lot of softcore scenes with the occasional penetration and BJ shot to it.  In this case, the theme is zombies.

The first half of the film is character introduction, I guess.  This is where most of the "erotic" scenes take place and it is boring as hell, but I suppose it's interesting enough for its historical value because it shows a time when people didn't shave their neither regions before mashing them against one another on camera.  Hairy mustachioed men get it on with hairy, unkempt women.  Two of the ladies are quite lovely in this film and I have no complaints about them prancing around unclothed on screen.  They would be Dirce Funari and of course, Laura Gemser.  Unfortunately we don't get to see Miss Gemser in any hardcore scenes in Erotic Nights of the Living Dead or any film as far as I know.  I think she always used a body double for the really naughty shots.

"Hi. I'm a frumpy stripper and I'll be your sommelier for the evening."
One of the things this movie in known for is the "champagne scene" but even that proved to be anticlimactic.  A stripper gives our protagonist played by George Eastman (who somehow manages to have sex several time during the film through his jeans) is given one of the lamest strip-shows I've ever seen by one of the local girls before she finally straddles a champagne bottle and uncorks it inside of her.  It's a great idea but ultimately it comes off a bit flat.

Eventually Mr. D'Amato gets around to telling a story; a story about zombies on a deserted island, and this is where the movie gets better.  It isn't much of a story,  just enough to get some zombies on screen to break up the monotony of boobies and bush.

An arrogant American business man has the idea to commercialize a small tropical island that the locals say is cursed.  He pays a sailor to take him and his salaried girlfriend to this "Cat Island" where they discover that the legends are true and that the living dead rise to feed on those who invade the island paradise.  Also, Laura Gemser bites off the guy's penis.

This movie reminded me of two others: Lucio Fulci's Zombi 2, which is a much superior film and has a zombie fighting a shark, and one of Joe D'Amato's other island horror movies, Anthropophagus: The Grim Reaper which came out the same year as this one.  So if you want to see a similar film without all of the soapy handjobs and hairy genitalia, watch one of those.  If you want to see a fairly decent zombie film with some boring hardcore scenes, check out Erotic Nights of the Living Dead.  Just make sure you get the unrated version.

Violence Rating/Index: 2.5 out of 5
Booby Rating/Index : 5+ out of 5  - Click to see the nude scenes.


8 comments:

G said...

Just for the boobies rating this has to be watched

MynameisEarl said...

Damn, I have no idea on what to say about this movie except for "WTF?"

T. Roger Thomas said...

I was going to suggest a modern remake of this film without all the hair but then I got to the bottom and found the link to the double feature.

R said...

Looks like a great movie!

Melanie said...

WOW. I didn't think it could be done. You are just a rock star!

D4 said...

Boring hardcore. How does that even happen? I'm intrigued and all but.. what.

Henry said...

I'll applaud just for the punny punny titles, if nothing else.

That Bastard From Bellingham said...

Oh dear lord, the 70's-stache, the Burt Reynoldsness of it is a thing to behold!

And holy shit, this is now goin' in my top five movies to check out. Frumpy strippers? Soft-ish hardcore-ish porno with zombies?

Fuck year~!

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