Tuesday, April 19, 2011

Gwendoline (1984)

Outrageous Adventures in the Kingdom of Women

It seems there are a million versions of this film.  The one released in North America back in 1984 was called The Perils of Gwendoline in the Land of the Yik Yak and was cut for time and content to comfortably attain an R rating.  The version that I watched and am reviewing is simply called Gwendoline and is sixteen minutes longer... which means more boobies.

Gwendoline features Tawny Kitaen who everyone remembers from that Whitesnake video where she basically humps the hood of a Jaguar.  No?  Well, she also doesn't wear her seatbelt and it looks very dangerous.  Anyway, this is the first time I've seen her in a movie and her acting abilities surprised me.  She's never going to win an Academy Award but she was definitely better than I thought she would be.  I think Zabou Breitman is the hotter of the two ladies, though.

The plot of Gwendoline is worthy of its B-Movie classification.  It begins with Gwendoline (Tawny Kitaen) being kidnapped after she shipped herself in a wooden crate to China in an attempt to find her father after he disappeared searching for an elusive species of butterfly.  As she is being sold to the owner of a shady casino, Willard (Brent Huff) climbs through the window and kills all the bad guys in the room to collect a gambling debt.  Gwendoline immediately falls in love and she and her companion Beth (Zabou Breitman) somehow convince this rascal to escort them to the dangerous and mysterious Land of the Yik Yak to find the missing entomologist.  After deserts and jungles, the three of them come upon the legendary Land of Yik Yak - a society of scantily clad women warriors ruled by an evil queen who wants Gwendoline's life and Willard's seed. 

"I will turn the laughter of these slaves into wails of torment!"
 Gwendoline is certainly not a great movie, but it is a decent one.  It's a campy cult film with a nude Tawny Kitaen; a fun, mindless bit of action and romance worth watching to pass the time.  This is another film that I don't think is worth hunting down, but it's worth checking out if you happen to come across it.  If you have a thing for Tawny Kitaen however, this may be the greatest movie ever made.

Violence Rating:  2.5 out of 5
Booby Rating:  4 out of 5  - Click to see who gets naked and how many nude scenes.

And here is that Whitesnake video.  If you look closely, there's a nip slip at 2:19.