3/22/11

Slaughter in San Francisco: Chuck Norris Explodes Across the Screen!

Slaughter in San Francisco
Recently I came across the poster art for this film, searched, then lamented that I couldn't find the movie.  I didn't give up.  I continued to search high and low until my work finally paid off.  I found a copy of Slaughter in San Francisco and I am so freaking glad that I did!

This movie had me laughing from the first few minutes. The acting, dubbing and dialogue are so comical that it's hard not to.  Somehow a police dog has the ability to communicate telepathically because it barks without even opening its mouth.  Impressive.  And for some reason, even though this film is set in San Francisco, one of the cops has an Irish accent.  At least I think that's supposed to be an Irish accent.  Who knows.  They even dubbed the voice of Chuck Norris.  For shame.

Chuck Norris isn't even the star of this movie.  He is absent through most of the film as Don Wong takes on the bad guys with fast as lightning kung-fu action until the climactic fight scene.  Chuck plays the smug, cigar smoking, girl rapin', mustachioed bad guy boss and he plays him well.

The story is pretty basic.  An incorruptible cop (Don Wong) is kicked off the force after he kills a guy with his lethal kung-fu moves.  Chuck Slaughter (Chuck Norris) tries to recruit him for his gang because the Chinese are loyal and reliable henchmen but Wong refuses.  After an evening at the pub, Wong's former partner is killed when he confronts a group of bank robbers.  You have to see the drunk walking/fighting performances in this film.  They are breathtaking.  Anyway, Wong avenges his partner's death by rooting out corrupt cops and dismantling the gangs of local thugs until he comes face to mustachioed face with the man who is behind it all... Chuck Slaughter.

"Prepare your anus."

It's impossible to convey how great this film is.  It's like the perfect campy kung-fu grindhouse movie.  If ever you come across a copy of Slaughter in San Francisco, watch it!  You will thank me.

Violence Rating:  3 out of 5
Booby Rating:  1.5 out of 5






36 comments:

A Beer for the Shower said...

No boobies, but an abundance of chest hair. Sold. The poster alone got a laugh from me.

PhotoClasher said...

"Prepare your anus ?"
LOL !

The Angry Lurker said...

......."Prepare your anus", good trailer and will have to look out for it.

Aaron M. Gipson said...

As a martial artist myself, I have respect for Chuck Norris' accomplishments in the ring. He just needs to get the hell out of the US political process.

Merlyy said...

Oh god how young he looks in the picture!

Meghan Moran said...

weird that chuck is hardly even in it. I bet he makes his screen time count though.

elexerdelex said...

But... But... a booby rating of 1.5? Are you sure I want to watch this?
Well if I ever do come across this I will!

amBored said...

young chuck? lol that quote

Patwa said...

Chuck <3 ^^

D4 said...

Chuck Norris can explode across the screen. Alive.

Tyrone said...

That looks insane! I haven't seen much of his early days!

Picnaster said...

Young Chuck rocks.

Bart said...

dat moustache

PvtCarlin said...

Wow, Chuck was epic when he was even my age.

Chip said...

this is a classic! :)

Malkavian said...

Hahahahaha Chuck looks so young an full of vigor, need to see this film.

THUNDERCAT832 said...

Young Chuck is scary as hell! Like a rabid 70's porno star! I love it!

Laughing Vault said...

hahaha he looks like he wants you to prepare it xD

Tasos said...

when you wrote Chuck Slaughter, I thought it was a nickname, so I IMDBed it. I will never doubt you again. The trailer looked a bit horrible.... I hope the policeman-dog telepathy makes it better!

Robert Fünf said...

Hahaha I need to see this film. (I should probably be drunk first, though.)

James said...

Dat face... Dat Hair... Dat stash

leanmeansteen said...

chuck norris as a villain is great

Biff Tanner said...

Must find!

Jay.CA said...

Chuck Slaughter? Yeah!

G said...

Good old Chuck making soup strainers cool!

Shutterbug said...

Oh, chuck norris! How you turn me on! ;)

Rabidmoose said...

Chuck Norris is most definitely hazardous to your health!

ed said...

haha - is it even realistic to kill someone by kung fu

Brut said...

Haha I love the moustache.

Bassislv said...

Chuck Norris rules, going to watch this one for sure!

Kicking Rocks said...

prepare your anus for chuck norris' mustache

Moob said...

Look at that stash

Sam said...

Yay CN.!

seorava said...

chuck norris could win the UFC with his left hand thumb and eyes closed

p said...

woooooooot! hooray for chuck norris!

TreeBranchez said...

Chuck Norris has become a legend amongst many internet users :L

Related Posts Plugin for WordPress, Blogger...